We parents don’t know it all about money…and its okay!

The final mistake that I feel parents are making is not getting educated themselves. A recent Jumpstart Coalition survey showed that “relatively few teachers felt they were adequately prepared to teach personal finance topics.” Parents and teachers, struggle with feeling educated themselves when it comes to financial literacy. It’s no wonder these topics aren’t discussed at home (number one mistake). Some parents are ashamed or embarrassed to admit they don’t know how to balance a checkbook or truly understand how credit cards work. Understand that it’s okay not to know everything, but it’s important to seek help. Reach out and get the education that will benefit both you and your kids. Empowerment and independence is a gift for every family member. Besides, its good for your kids to see that we as parents don’t know everything.

I’m not proud of this one, but I’m guilty too!

Number four mistake: Feeling guilty. Boy, do I know this one! As a single mom, wanting to give my child everything is a natural instinct. If I don’t, the ‘mom guilt’ runs amuck. We need to let go of the thought that we need to give our kids everything. I often hear, “I want to give my kids the things I never had.” I understand this and can relate, but there comes a point where this begins to work against us. If we continue to gift our kids with ‘things’, just because, we are sending the wrong messages. Not always, but oftentimes, these kids begin to feel entitled and will expect that trend to continue. Don’t feel the guilts, instead feel proud that you are teaching your kids invaluable lessons. This is a work in progress for me too, so I completely understand if it comes with some bumps.

Teens, money and mistakes

This week we’re on to number three!

The number three mistake we as parents are making: Not holding our kids accountable. If your child does something against the household rules, typically there are consequences. Pull on the dog’s tail and you may get bitten. This is how our kids learn right from wrong, good from bad, etc. When it comes to spending money or using credit cards, oftentimes parents come to the rescue. Bailing our kids out of a financial mess, without having them pay the consequences, isn’t holding them accountable. As a parent of a teen myself, I understand how difficult it is to watch our kids ‘fall’, but fall they must, in order to pick themselves back up. Stop rescuing and instead, use the word ‘NO’ more often. Easier said then done, I get that, but start today and they reap the benefits tomorrow.

Number two mistake that parents are making with teaching kids about money!

Stop playing the ATM machine!!. Whether your kids want to hit the mall or grab a cup of coffee with friends, it seems the first thing they do is come running to the Bank of Mom or Dad and take a withdrawal. Stop! If they don’t have the cash from their own doing, they just can’t buy what they want to buy. We as parents, myself included, struggle with the desire to be our child’s ‘friend’.  As friends we want to do and give in order to please, but as parents, this will backfire. We are doing our kids a disservice if we don’t teach them how to be self reliant. We won’t always be popular with our kids, which is fine. We’re the parents, we’re the disciplinarian. That’s what they need, and deep down, really want.

Watch for number three reason next week! Oh joy :)

Top 5 mistakes parents are making with teens and money: Mistake number one

Money is a topic that makes most people cringe. Especially in the present economic climate, it’s generally not a fun conversation to have. I’d like to change that. Some tell me that my mission of teaching financial literacy to teens is similar to turning the Titanic…it’s going to take a long, long time and require a lot of effort.
Fine, we better get moving now then!

Although I prefer to discuss what we as parents are doing correctly, I’ve been asked several times from various people, to talk about what we are doing wrong. Let me start by saying, don’t beat yourself up if you find some of the following issues ring true for you. We are all doing the best we can, so take the information, make the changes that apply and move forward.

Number one mistake: parents aren’t talking! We talk about school, friends, drugs, smoking, sports and more, but never about money. Without question, everything I mentioned above is critical, it’s just not enough. Start the conversation about money over dinner, while driving or when shopping at the grocery store. It doesn’t need to be some heavy, boring talk, which would tune your kids out anyways. The intention is to bring an awareness of spending habits, saving habits, credit card pitfalls, and more, to your child’s radar.

Keep it simple, keep it short. Talk often, listen more.

Stay tuned for next week when I discuss mistake number two!

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